disjoint thoughts » funny http://disjointthoughts.com Thu, 29 Dec 2011 04:23:36 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 i must be doing something right http://disjointthoughts.com/2009/06/25/i-must-be-doing-something-right/ http://disjointthoughts.com/2009/06/25/i-must-be-doing-something-right/#comments Thu, 25 Jun 2009 17:00:49 +0000 Ben http://disjointthoughts.com/?p=410 The infamous Misty Murphy posted a picture of a cafepress climbing shirt I designed. I’m honored :) Hey Misty, you might like this shirt too:

pics 006

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Check out more pictures of shirts I’ve designed.

]]> http://disjointthoughts.com/2009/06/25/i-must-be-doing-something-right/feed/ 1 the summer life of a teacher http://disjointthoughts.com/2009/06/24/the-summer-life-of-a-teacher/ http://disjointthoughts.com/2009/06/24/the-summer-life-of-a-teacher/#comments Wed, 24 Jun 2009 23:10:51 +0000 Ben http://disjointthoughts.com/?p=416 This picture of my awesome girlfriend Erin, pretty much sums up the summer life of a teacher…

the summer life of a teacher

The full story however doesn’t end there….

Kiddy pool from Fry’s: $7
Two blocks ice from QT: $3.50
Massage after getting a sore neck from cramming yourself into a kiddy pool for a couple hours: $65
Telling your friends you can’t climb because you injured your neck in a kiddy pool: PRICELESS!

]]> http://disjointthoughts.com/2009/06/24/the-summer-life-of-a-teacher/feed/ 0 poor blog http://disjointthoughts.com/2009/05/05/poor-blog/ http://disjointthoughts.com/2009/05/05/poor-blog/#comments Tue, 05 May 2009 23:44:34 +0000 Ben http://disjointthoughts.com/?p=406 My poor blog, it gets so little love. Today I give you back your old wordpress theme, elegant grunge (with some modifications of course) and a picture of Flat Stanley helping me at work today.

flat stanley

]]> http://disjointthoughts.com/2009/05/05/poor-blog/feed/ 2 my frosty mug http://disjointthoughts.com/2009/01/15/my-frosty-mug/ http://disjointthoughts.com/2009/01/15/my-frosty-mug/#comments Thu, 15 Jan 2009 16:16:33 +0000 Ben http://disjointthoughts.com/?p=396 snowbowl 003

Let the snowboarding season begin!

]]> http://disjointthoughts.com/2009/01/15/my-frosty-mug/feed/ 0 is soviet russia cupcakes grab you http://disjointthoughts.com/2008/10/17/is-soviet-russia-cupcakes-grab-you/ http://disjointthoughts.com/2008/10/17/is-soviet-russia-cupcakes-grab-you/#comments Fri, 17 Oct 2008 19:02:42 +0000 Ben http://disjointthoughts.com/?p=296 fatten

Thanks for fattening us up for Thanksgiving Preston!

]]> http://disjointthoughts.com/2008/10/17/is-soviet-russia-cupcakes-grab-you/feed/ 0 the truth about belaying http://disjointthoughts.com/2008/10/06/the-truth-about-belaying/ http://disjointthoughts.com/2008/10/06/the-truth-about-belaying/#comments Mon, 06 Oct 2008 16:57:02 +0000 Ben http://disjointthoughts.com/?p=289 belaying

Photo taken with my brand spanking new Canon 40D with a 50mm f/1.4 prime =)

]]> http://disjointthoughts.com/2008/10/06/the-truth-about-belaying/feed/ 0 i am a badass mofo http://disjointthoughts.com/2008/08/28/i-am-a-badass-mofo/ http://disjointthoughts.com/2008/08/28/i-am-a-badass-mofo/#comments Thu, 28 Aug 2008 16:51:46 +0000 Ben http://disjointthoughts.com/?p=277 I’m usually not one to talk about how awesome I am, or brag about any of my crazy adventures. Even if someone else starts tooting my horn, I’ll usually play it off with “nah… it wasn’t all that.” Well today I’m going to forget about that because according to the Up My Own Ass blog I am a badass mofo. Here’s a little quote from the post:

I wonder if he is one of those guys that you get into a fight with at a bar, and you know you are screwed after the first punch when you land it squarly in his face and he just starts laughing… and then you piss your pants.

The whole thing is hilarious and I ASSURE you it is completely and honestly 47% true. Click here to check out the whole post.

]]> http://disjointthoughts.com/2008/08/28/i-am-a-badass-mofo/feed/ 3 what is a Reverse Bel-Air? http://disjointthoughts.com/2008/08/19/what-is-a-reverse-bel-air/ http://disjointthoughts.com/2008/08/19/what-is-a-reverse-bel-air/#comments Tue, 19 Aug 2008 16:37:55 +0000 Ben http://disjointthoughts.com/?p=269 I love xkcd. This geeky comic almost never fails to bring a smile to my face. But every now and then the comic is so abstract and cryptic that I have no clue what they’re talking about. This strip in particular had me scratching my head until i found this post by Jenner on the xkcd forums:

Examples of Bel-air vs Reverse Bel-air is as so:

Bel-air:
I ate some pretty bad food at this really dingy diner last night and I think I may have gotten food poisoning. I’ve been up all night with a stomach ache and lets say nothing about what’s been going on below that. I just don’t understand /b/, what should I do? I mean, it wasn’t like I ate that much of it. I just got in one little fight and my mom got scared and said you’re moving in with your auntie and uncle in Bel-air.

Reverse Bel-air:
Now this is a story all about how my life got flip-turned upside down and I’d like to take a minute just sit right there I’ll tell you how I got arrested for soliciting a minor while just waiting for my nephew to get out of elementary school with my stereo blaring. It’s tragic really, serve and protect my butt.

As you can see, the Bel-air melds the song into the end of the conversation, and you suddenly realize they’re singing Fresh Prince. Whereas the reverse starts with Fresh Prince and then merges in the relevant conversation.

]]> http://disjointthoughts.com/2008/08/19/what-is-a-reverse-bel-air/feed/ 6 how to get someone to stop parking in your parking spot http://disjointthoughts.com/2008/08/07/how-to-get-someone-to-stop-parking-in-your-parking-spot/ http://disjointthoughts.com/2008/08/07/how-to-get-someone-to-stop-parking-in-your-parking-spot/#comments Thu, 07 Aug 2008 17:00:35 +0000 Ben http://disjointthoughts.com/?p=237 Let’s say you have an awesome parking spot. Maybe not as cool as the parking spots we have at OpenRain, but a good one nonetheless.

parking spot

What do you do if someone else jacks your spot? Leave them a nice, passive aggressive, note for them:
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Worked for me!

]]> http://disjointthoughts.com/2008/08/07/how-to-get-someone-to-stop-parking-in-your-parking-spot/feed/ 5 wii sports: the ab workout http://disjointthoughts.com/2008/05/13/wii-sports-the-ab-workout/ http://disjointthoughts.com/2008/05/13/wii-sports-the-ab-workout/#comments Tue, 13 May 2008 15:00:40 +0000 Ben http://disjointthoughts.com/?p=235 Are you wanting to develop rock hard abs? Is the lack of a six pack impeding on your ability to attract members of the opposite sex? Is most exercise you get on a daily bases coming from your Wii? If you’ve answered “YES!” to any of these questions, the Wii Sports Ab Workout might be your road to success.

Follow these easy steps to get started with the Wii Sports Ab Workout:

Step #1: Load up Wii Sports and start a round of boxing.
Step #2: Hold the Wiimote with the toes on your right foot (If you cannot hold the Wiimote between your toes, you may consider attaching them to your feet, or a pair of sandals, using medical tape).
Step #3: Hold the Nunchuck with the toes on your left foot.
Step #4: Lay on the floor.
Step #5: BOX!

wii sports ab workout (4)

Note: you cannot use your arms/elbows to prop yourself up! It will require the use of your abs if you want to watch the screen.

For an extra bonus, play with a friend! The shear hilarity of the experience will make surely make you laugh until tears roll down your cheeks and thus increase the burn to your abdomen even further!

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